Get Your Head Out Of Your Ass! (Political Rant)

I consider myself patriotic, a supporter for what the America stands for, and a proud supporter of our military and all they do fur us, domestic and foreign.  Yet, what was the first thing that came to mind when I saw this picture today?  It wasn't the pride of the military personnel.  It wasn't the pride in the bid American flag.  It was that there goes our military marching home because our government is in compete shutdown.

And why is our government in complete shutdown?  Because we have a bunch of complete dumbass people, yes people we all have elected, who can’t get their head out of their ass long enough to see what their personal agendas are doing to this great country.  I’m not picking on or singling out the Republicans, or the Democrats, or even the President.  I’M CALLING OUT EVERY LAST ONE OF THEM!!!  Politics in this country has gotten so far away from what it should be and was designed to be that the political system in general is a complete and total clusterfuck.  

Every last one of them are too busy pushing their own agendas and what will line their pockets to do what is right or expected of them by those that elected them and that they are supposed to represent.  They all spend money the government does not have and keep raising debt ceilings so they can spend more.  (If we “normal people” tried that and conducted our business that way we would be broke and in jail)  They push programs and policies down our throat that a majority of people do not want.  The two political sides have gotten so far apart and to the extreme edges, it would take them weeks to even agree on what to have for lunch, no less how to run a country.  

For the past few years, the U.S. economy has been at the forefront of problems and concerns.  Money has been pumped into the economy to try to keep it going and get tings rolling again.  Unemployment is a major concern.  Our government is constantly looking of r ways to boost the economy or claim they are creating jobs.  Well don’t look now, but they just sent hundreds of thousands, if not millions, of people home without pay because the government is in shutdown mode.  How does that help the economy?  How does that help create new spending and jobs?  How does that keep more families from struggling?  And why?  Because being stubborn and standing by your Political Party and not giving in is apparently more important than the people who elected you and who you are supposed to represent.  Because apparently your own agenda is more important than all the people just sent home without a job.  Because now the workers that actually do help those that depend on the government can’t help, and those in need are that much more worse off then they already were.

Wake up Washington!  Get your head out of your Political Parties ass and see what you are doing to this great nation.  Take a look at what you are doing to this country.  You are making us much worse than you are better.  You are showing us all what you are really made of and why you really wanted to be elected…not for us but for yourself.  And yes, that goes for you too Mr. President.  You of all people should get off your high horse and own political agenda and realize what this is causing, and should be sitting in the middle demanding everyone get over themselves.  Instead, even the liberal media can see right through the fact that you are standing your own ground and not budging.  Your own agenda is more important than what is best for this country.  And I’m sorry, but your standing ground to raise the debt ceiling to so you can spend money we don’t have to push through your precious health care plan is not good for this country.  Especially at the expense of jobs and American people’s livelihood.  

I hope every last one of you get removed at the end of your political term just out of principle.  I don’t care what side you’re on or what Party you claim.  You should all be ashamed of yourself for letting it come to this and being involved in this in the first place.  

Rant over and you will now be rejoining your regularly scheduled blogs already in progress!

DV

Is It Play Or Is It Real?!?!

For me it's fairly easy to break BDSM into two main categories.  First, there are those that just like the kink and the role play, which I call kinksters.  It may just be sexually or from time to time for fun or as a way to spice things up.  The second is those that Domination and submission is is a deep part of who they are and something they need in their life.  It transcends just play and kink and is some they need to feel complete and whole.  It's a way of life.  I, without a doubt, fall into the second group.  It's a part of me and what I need to have as a part of a relationship.  It's part of who I am.  There is nothing wrong with being a kinkster, so don't get me wrong.  Either is fine as long as it works for the person engaged in it.  You have to find what fits and is right for you.  But just for play or a role...not for me.

Whenever I see problems within this lifestyle, one way or another it seems to come back to the difference in these two categories, or at least many times it does.  And when people are new to this, especially Dominants, or those claiming to be Dominants, this is the part they just don't get...not yet anyway.  This doesn't mean they can't learn and that most don't want to learn, but they aren't there yet. These Dominants jump right in when they see this and think it looks fun.  They think it would be great to have a woman be at his beck and call.  

Many submissive women, on the other hand, come into this with a deeper understanding initially of who they are and what they need.  They have looked at this for a long time before taking steps towards this lifestyle.  They know it's a part of who they are and what they need.  They have likely battled within themselves as to whether they can or really want to do this.  Or whether they feel it's even right and ok to do this.  They may be very scared and vulnerable but know they need a Dominant Man in their life to be accountable to and to have oversee them.

This is the difference between the categories...one seeing it as fun and play, at least initially, while the other
sees it as a way of being and needing the depth of it.  This tends to lead to a lot of potential issues that neither is aware of, prepared to face, or even knows exists.  This is where I see the problems arise and where things can go so very wrong.

Most Dominants don't start out know just how deep and what a responsibility being Dominant really can be.  He doesn't realize just how much the submissive will rely on him and need him.  A majority of what she needs from him will come outside of their scenes or play.  It's before during and after the scene that she needs the care, support, and reassurance from her Dominant.  The Dom has to realize that he is responsible for, and that the sub is looking for, her mental and emotional well being.  He has to realize and understand that the actual play only lasts a short time, but the support and care she needs lasts throughout the entire relationship, day in and day out.  The Dominant should never jeopardize the subs physical, emotional, or mental health and well being just because he wants to have fun, and have her get him off.  If you aren't prepared and expecting to deal with ALL parts of the submissive, you shouldn't be wanting to deal with just the physical apsects.  The exception to this is if both people are completely open, up front, and share their position and expectations and are in total agreement.

I am just looking at this from my own point of view, and where I am coming from as a Dominant that sees this as part of who he is.  Again, there is absolutely nothing wrong with just enjoying the play aspects of BDSM, and there are many people that do.  Yet, I believe it's vitally important for those involved to be open about how they see this and what they expect from it.  Is it just fund and play, or is it a dynamic within a relationship that you are seeking?  If it's the relationship, then you have to be wiling to learn, and study and give more than you may have ever given...and in this I am speaking to the Dominant.  Be ready, willing, and able to care for your submissive, inside and out.  If you aren't willing to put that much time and effort into the relationship then you need to be wiling to take a step back and look at the bigger picture...the submissive's overall mental, emotional and physical health and well being.  She is putting all that in your hands, so you better be willing and able to handle all that involves.

The Dark Side Of This Lifestyle...

I received an email from a woman who said she was newly submissive, had lot of questions and needs help.  With her permission, I have cleaned up the email a bit, taken out any personal info, and posted it below.  I thought it would be a great learning tool for many people, as well as for her, to see and read your comments on this.

I know some of your comments will be long, but that is expected and perfectly fine.  Feel free to cover as much of this as you like for her and all others to see.  I responded to her privately about how bad I thought this situation really is.  I look forward to the comments of all my readers and this situation.  Least to say...I think this is what we all warn about and see as a bad and dark side of this lifestyle and how some people use it for really bad and selfish purposes.  This is about as far from what D/s should be, in my opinion.  This is how good people get sucked into really bad situations and ruin what can be such a wonderful and beautiful relationship and lifestyle.

This is your blog post now, so post your comments and views on this situation.

DV
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I got on this site called plenty of fish.  This Dom on their found me.  We connected, had a lot in common.  Ive always been interested in bondage but nevr tried it .  I had never been involved with a dom before.  He has told me i belong to him.  Then he brought in what he called a toy for us to play with.  Found out it was a past submissive.  She saw how much our connection with each other was.  She decided she wanted to pull out during this time.  He gets distant from me.   The girl calls me tells me she fell in love with him but pulled out cause she saw we could have something better.  Since she left hes been different with me . He says he doesnt know when he can come see me cause of his job.  He works acorss the country for long periods of time.  So he started sending me to fuck other guys while listening in on phone and controlling when i pee and then told me he wanted me fucked till he got down here to me.  Then later he told me i couldnt fuck no one unless he was listening in cause i was a hot woman.  He has me do videos of me with guys to send to him and of me peeing and everything.  He also told me he wanted evrything i had to offer someone for him only.  Even told me while hes out of state he wanted me so bad it hurt .  He goes home and i dont hear from him but one time out of a week.  I can only talk to him when he contacts me on his work phone.  He hasnt gave me his cell number and we also only have contact by email . This has cause a lot of emotions over me like wanting him more cause of no contact and missing him and lonely and also hurting for him at the same time.  Ive never done this before and these emotions i feel as if ive fallen for him and not sure how a submissive handles emotions like this when her dom is distant.  Hes told me to be patient with him alot and that we were ok but its hard when i dont hear from him and have to wonder when i will hear from him after hes gone back home.  But while hes at work he talks to me from sun up to midnight.  I'm just confused.   Ask any questions you want, i need help.

The Passion...

Writing erotic stories is not my forte.  It's just not something I usually do.  It's not my writing style or what I tend to post on my blog.  Several years ago I wrote one, and had all but forgotten it until I found it on my computer a couple of days ago.  So, I thought to be different I would share it with you all.  It's not the best, by any means, but maybe someone out there in DV blogland will enjoy it.

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The Passion

I am standing before you, and your back is against the wall.
You are wearing that sexy little dress, your heels and those
hot smooth legs showing. You grin at me while biting on your
bottom lip and slowly pull your dress up, exposing more
and more of your thigh. All I can do as I watch is get lost in
the curves of those sexy legs. There is the excitement of
what else is above what I can see, but still hidden under
your dress. You can see that I am getting hard inside my pants
as your eyes glance down while you look at me. It’s what you want and what you need.

I move towards you, put my hands on the wall on each side of
your head. I nuzzle my face against yours, as we can each
feel the breath of the other in our ear. Your hand has moved
up and is rubbing my chest. Your other hand moves up to the
back of my head, to hold me close, so I can't leave you.
I use the fingertips of one hand to lightly rub up and down
your arm. Your shoulders are against the wall, but your
hips have slightly moved out and towards me, like your pelvis
is reaching out to be touched. My hand moves down your side
and back up. I continue this as you begin slowly kissing
my neck and ear. Our breathing has picked up and is now heavier
than before, yet is in unison. With your hand still behind
my head, you finally move around to kiss me. Our lips brushing
each other, with tongues barely reaching beyond our lips.
Then we both lock up as tight as we can. Mouth to mouth, tongues
exploring each other. Our free hands have tightened their
grip in showing the pleasure of each of us. Once our kiss
breaks, you reach down and pull up your dress enough to get
your hands under it. You grab the top edges of your panties
and begin to pull them down. Once you get them so far, they
fall to the floor, and you step out of them.

You lean to me and whisper in my ear: "You make me soooo
wet". You know I like to hear you describe your state of arousal to me. You ask
me if I like what you are doing for me. Before I can do anything you reach
down under your dress and rub yourself briefly. Your hand
them comes up and I can smell your sweetness on your fingers.
You rub your finger on my lips and spread yourself around.
I lick my lips to have my taste. I then take your fingers and
slowly lick your juice from them. You taste so sweet, and
I have a deep desire to only want to taste more. Then I kiss
you deeply, as if I am trying to devour you. Then you say
"I love the way I taste in your mouth, may I please taste more?" Both of
us are so turned on that it is hard to contain the passion
that is inspired by the energy flowing between us. I grab
the hair on the back of you head and pull your head
back. I am kissing your throat and my way down your chest
to your cleavage, as far as I can go until your dress restricts
me. Then I take my tongue, in a very light fashion, and slowly
lick all the way back up your chest, your neck, cross your
chin, and into your mouth, where we begin to passionately
kiss once again. Your hand has made it's way down, and
is in search of my cock. But before you get there you ask if you can touch me.

You know not to do so without asking first. You have waited as long as you can.
You have to feel me. You have to have it, at least by touch. But you know I

will only let you when I decide. I tell you it’s ok and to proceed. You find it stretching down my leg, and wrap your dainty hand around it and squeeze. Then you rub up and down my length with squeezes mixed in every so many strokes. The time has
come for my manhood to be released. You want to feel the flesh
of it, and you have to feel it now or you think you will go crazy.

I decide it's time to move to a much more comfortable
location. As we head for the bed, I tell you to unzip your dress, which you do, letting
it fall to the floor. I stand there in awe as I look at the perfect
view from behind. The sweet curves of your hips and ass
as they stretch up across your back to your shoulders,
and down those sultry legs that I love so much. The entire
landscape is a sight to behold. And to know that it belongs to me.

I could just stare at it for hours as I unlock the mystery of every curve you have. As
you turn around and sit on the edge of the bed, you ask me if
I will kindly undress for you. You watch intently as I remove first
my shirt, and then my pants. You are anxiously waiting to
see my cock as I unwrap it from the clothes it is hidden beneath.
You have a sheepish grin on your face, like a kid in a candy store, as the
moment you see me gets closer and closer. While this is transpiring,
you have raised your legs slightly, and spread them wide for me.
I can see the glistening of your arousal I as look at you.
Your delicate flower is so beautiful, yet is more like a
venus fly trap. It is very enticing and just waiting for
it's prey to near so it can wrap itself around it's
prey in hopes of never letting it go.

As I lower my boxer's you finally get a vision of what
you have been waiting for. The time has come for you to give yourself to me like you have before. As you desire to do. As you need to do. My cock is perfect for you and everything you love. My cock is at full attention as I look back at you and your
spread beauty. Your hands begin to cup and squeeze your
tits and tweak your nipples. You are so excited about the
moment before you that your skin is flushed and you have
the look of not being sure what to do next, because you want
to do it all. I quickly tell you that you were not asked to touch yourself, and

your hands quickly fall to your side, as not to disappoint me. You know this direction was not given, but you had gotten lost in the moment.

As I look down, I can see a trickle of your wetness
dripping out of your swollen pussy, and running towards
your ass. I know how excited you are, as I am the same. Yet, your own pleasure

will come from mine, and you know this. Accept this. Love this. I tell you to touch your pussy the way I like to see. Your hand moves down across your tummy and to your wanting pussy. You begin to smear all the sweet nectar around making it
shine in the light like a beacon. As I walk to you, standing fully erect, my hard cock
is on a collision course with your mouth. I stop just short
of running into you. I tell you to smear yourself all over me. You raise your hand and begin to lubricate me with your own natural solution. You start at the head
of my cock, and work your way down my shaft. You have to get
your hand wet, by rubbing your own pussy, a couple of more
times in order to cover me completely. The smell of your
sexual existence, and the fact that you are rubbing it all
over me, is totally consuming me. In concert with your touch
up and down me, it is almost a complete overload to my senses. Yet, I am in control. I must keep control. I shall not show weakness. You look
up at me with an intent yet seductive look, staring me in
the eye as if to say "are you ready?" You love being
able to hold and stroke me. You also love being able to taste
yourself on my cock, and I know this. There is just something about the erotic
nature of tasting your own juices on me that almost makes
you cum at the anticipation of it.

I tell you to please proceed, and you know exactly what that means.

As you look down at me, you notice the pre-cum droplet forming
on the tip of my cock. You can see it mixing with the lubrication
you have already applied to me, and that is almost more than you
can take. You finally have been allowed move in, and it’s just what you have been wanting. With tongue out, you lean in and slowly lick the drop from me. Feeling me on your tongue and the taste of us both is all you had hoped it would
be. You continue slowly licking around the head of my cock,
while holding the base of it in one hand. You lift me up and
go down to the point where my shaft meets my scrotum. You
take your tongue and slowly, in one constant motion, lick
me all the way back up to the head. You pull my cock a bit to
the side and begin kissing and sucking on the shaft, starting
at the base and working your way up. My hand is running through
your hair, caressing your face, and gently pulling every
so often, in a response to the overwhelming feel of your
actions. You know how much it pleases me for you to do this. It also pleases you to know how much I am pleased. Finally you take the head of me in your mouth. I
love the warmth and wetness of the way you feel when you do
this. You gently suck and pull me out and do this several
times. You begin to take more and more of me into your mouth with each stroke of your mouth. It's almost as if you are in search of fresh juice of
your own production, up and down my cock. Because of my size,
you aren't sure if you can take all of me in, but you want
to more than anything. As you slowly try, I feel myself hit
the back of your throat. I look down, I see your lips wrapped
around me, I have the feel of your hot mouth, and you are still
trying to take me all in. It's like you trying to devour
every last part of me you can. I let out a moan that indicates
to you how much I like what you are doing. This just makes
you want it even more.

You can feel the energy flowing from my cock through your
entire body. The electricity sends tingles all over you
from your head to your toes. You feel your pussy slightly
throbbing as it so longs to be touched, to have some attention
paid to it, and most of all to be filled. My hand still running
through your hair makes it's way to the back of your
head. I cup your head with my hand, and begin to pull
your head onto my cock as you perform your own good deeds
to it. You begin to moan and I feel you get into it a bit more. The
more I pull on your head, the more aggressive your mouth
gets on my cock. It's like I pushed a button, and all
of a sudden you went into overdrive. You love when you feel forced to suck me.

Like if you tried to stop I would hold you on my cock and in your throat, until I decided you could relax. As you slow your speed down a bit, and you get on the down stroke, having me deep inside your mouth, I pull you onto me even more. It's
as if I'm trying to get deeper and deeper into your throat. I love to push your limits, both mentally and physically. Knowing you can’t take much more of me, yet in an effort to please me you keep trying with all your soul. You love this and are taking in as much of me as you can every time your mouth and lips slide down me. I look down
and see that your free hand is becoming antsy. I tell you it’s ok to touch yourself, and you immediately beginning stroking your pussy. Stroking the entire thing back and
forth, stopping every so often to tease and pay attention
to your swollen bud. You are also toying with your opening
and diving a couple of fingers inside yourself. The more
you touch yourself, the hotter and more excited and lost
in the moment you get. This translates as well to the more
into sucking my cock you are.

You want me to cum so bad you can hardly stand it. You want
to feel the pulse and the throb in your mouth. You beg me to cum for you.

“Please Sir, cum for me. I need to taste you. I need to know I’m pleasing you. You know how much I need it.” A few words of encouragement later, you continue you’re your excellent work. “Very soon you will have your wish” I tell you.

You can notice how my cock has swelled
and is now taking up more room in your mouth. You are sucking
on me with all you have, and teasing your own pussy at the
same time. Your rhythm slows just a bit and you can feel the
throb of my cock. I am pulling your head harder onto
me now as I feel myself nearing my explosion. I start telling
you "Make me cum! Make me cum! Oh god I'm going
to cum!" I feel your pace pick back up as you are doing
everything possible to get me there. You begin to have muffled
moans as you are also about to make yourself cum. I can tell by the
torsions of your body and the way you sound that you are getting there yourself,
but you don't dare slow down on me. Between your own self-pleasure, and pleasing your Master, it’s enough to make you explode. Yet you know that my pleasure comes first. No matter how much you want or need to cum, you don’t dare. And you know I can tell and will know if you do. You take your hand,
the one you have been using on yourself, and reach towards
my face. You want me to be able to taste all the juice that is covering
and dripping from your fingers, since you know how I enjoy that. As I taste the sweetness, you feel the pulses start in my cock, and then the explosion
as I unleash myself into your mouth. You take me in as deep
as you can, to feel me coat your throat. Feeling me shoot,
the taste and the pulses of my cock in your mouth is enough
to make your pussy begin to convulse on it’s own. It's a natural
spasm and reaction to the overload of your senses as all
this has come together at once. You slowly stop sucking
on me, and begin licking me, as my once rock hard cock begins
to subside. You know not to leave any of the gift I
have given you, not one drop, and you make sure to lick every last drop
of me you can find.

I lean down and begin to kiss and caress you once again. I praise you for your good work, and that brings a big smile to your face. You have once again brought that pleasure to me, and you so love that. You elate in looking at me and knowing I am happy with your actions. That you have been able to please me in such a way. You feel the warmth inside you as your enjoyment takes over your body. Knowing you not only did as I asked, but as you so love to do yourself. Once again, you have proven yourself to me, and you will be rewarded for that. I take my finger and wipe a little drop of cum off your chin, and put it in your mouth. I smile as I look at you and say “You missed a drop!”  

The Fear Of A Dominant...

There is something I have been thinking about lately.  I know...a scary thought.  You could probably feel the ground shaking from wherever you are, and no it's not an earthquake.  This morning I read a post from Fondles, which can be read HERE.  It was an interview of her Dom with her asking him questions.  He touched on the very thing, at least in a round about way from the way I read it, of what I have had going through my head.

I have written over the years quite a bit about the feelings and emotions that happen for a submissive.  What goes on inside their head and many seem to face.  It's something I feel like I have a good grasp on and understand.  At times I have also written about the Dominant and what he is dealing with, as well.  What I have been grappling with lately is the emotions and vulnerability a Dom can feel.

The stereotype and view of Dominants as a whole is that of being stoic, having their house in order, and always being calm and in charge.  Being able to handle any situation, and not having emotions play into it. He can seem calculated and devious and know his place and roll well.  Actually though, I guess that's the case in the world as a whole...women are emotional and men aren't.  Well, I'm here to give you a little bit of insight.That's not always the case.  At least not with me anyway.

As much as I may appear to have a crap together on the outside, what's happening on the inside can be complete chaos.  Not all the time, so don't think I'm a bumbling mess.  But there are times when I can struggle just as much as the submissive I may write about.  Just as with a sub, I can need to be reassured.  I need to know where we stand and that I'm needed.  I need to know that my feelings for my sub are reciprocated.  I need to know that I'm not putting myself out on a limb only to have the limb cut and I come crashing down.

Just because I am a Dominant in my relationships, it doesn't mean I don't have fears and feelings and emotions.  It doesn't mean that I don't feel vulnerable in exposing myself and putting myself out there, just as I would require my submissive to do.  I need to be wanted.  I need to be appreciated.  I need to feel cared for and loved.  This is no different than a submissive needing these same things.  Just because she needs to submit and offer up her body, mind and heart to follow and obey, doesn't mean she doesn't need to also feel all these protections from her Dominant.  I need the same thing from my submissive.

Just as I want her to need me, I want to need her.  I need to have her wanting and needing me and feeling like I'm the only one that can give her what she needs in a Dominant.  Conversely, I want to feel like I need her and can't do without all she brings to the table and gives to me. It's that needing someone and being that open with someone that can be scary.  It can bring about fear.  It can bring feelings of insecurity in needing someone in that way, and be painful in the thought of losing her or not having that with her.

A submissive should be just as important to a Dom as the Dom is to the submissive.  Yes, facing the feeling and vulnerability can be difficult.  It can lay you out there and make you feel so very exposed and like nothing good can come from it.  Especially for a Dominant that feels like is supposed to be the strong one.  Yet, when it is all reciprocated and the feelings and emotions run both directions, it can be such a beautiful thing.  And when your submissive can see this in you and knows just how much you care for her, and need her like she needs you, then ultimately she will give you more and submit more than she would have otherwise.

So, don't think that Dominants are mean, uncaring and emotionless people.  That is very far from the case, and underneath the image of being totally in charge and in control, there are times when that is anything but what's really happening.  Just don't tell anyone I shared this with you.  I'm sure it's a violation of some sort of "Dom Code" that I let you in on this little secret.  I'd hate to get kicked out of the club and be banned from our secret handshake for telling you all this.

Brought From The Dark...

She knew this was what she wanted...

She didn't know it all, but...

Knew enough to know this was who she is...

She reached out to Him and He answered...

He promised to lead her...

To show her...

To help her find herself...

Her true self...

The one she has never known, yet...

At the same time always knew was there...

Even though she knew what to expect...

She really didn't know...

She couldn't know...

Everything was different...

Even things that were the same as before...

Now they were different...

They felt different...

She felt different...

She felt alive...

Almost hypersentive...

Like all the time before she was numb...

More emotions...

Deeper emotions...

Like she never expected...

And didn't know how to deal with them...

Feeling exposed and vulnerable...

Wanting to run...

Wanting to hide...

Yet, wanting to expose even more...

Feeling safer than ever before...

While feeling so very afraid...

Afraid to open up...

Afraid to try...

Afraid to give completely...

Yet, the fear of not giving...

That was even more frightening...

He wants all she is...

All she has...

All she hasn't even discovered yet...

But can she give it to him...

Can she commit to him...

All she knows is He has given her more...

More than anyone ever has...

And wants to give even more...

And she wants it almost as much as...

She needs air to breathe...

But is afraid...

One thing she knows for sure...

She has seen it...

He has taken her there...

She has been brought from the dark...

Of who she has been...

And now it all shines brightly before her...

He has brought her...

Into the light...
His light...
And there is no other light...
Only his light...
In which she wants to bask.

Kneeling Inspiration

Credit to author HERE

There is so much I could say about this, but I feel like I have already said it.  So...I will let this speak for itself.  It says so much that I could never put into words and do it justice.  I couldn't have worded this better myself.

DV