As you may have read in Master's previous post, there has been some struggle with adjusting to our new norm. Adjusting to living together and the day to day stuff has been quite easy and has felt like a natural transition. However, we have additional responsibilities that the average newlyweds don't normally have. We have the 19yr old living at home while going to college. We have the 12yr old that thinks she's 19 and should have the same rights as the 19yr old. We also have the 91yr old that for the most part is pretty self sufficient, but still needs help on a daily basis. Our home feels like Grand Central Station with everyone coming and going. Needless to say, there has been very little alone time for the boss and I. The cherry on top of our madness...Master's spanking arm is injured!
*insert tears*
As I sit here writing this, I am doing so with some heavy guilt. You see, I have been feeling a bit neglected. Actually, I feel like we have been neglecting "us" and I haven't exactly been handling it with the grace of a slave. As I sit here I can hear Master helping his grandmother to bed. We have a baby monitor in her room so that we can hear her if she needs anything during the night. Right now I hear him kiss her goodnight and say "I love you MaMa"
*insert more tears*
That's right kids, the big Domly DV loves his MaMa! He adores her and she him. He is amazing with her. As hard as it has been, and as much work and worry that it can be, I am incredibly happy for Master that he is able to have this time with her. She tells me just about every day "don't tell anyone this, but he has always been my favorite grandchild" And just like that the feelings of neglect are replaced with feelings of selfishness. I've been thinking of myself and my own selfish wants/needs instead of keeping my focus where it belongs...on my Master, on his wants and needs, and my service to him.
Perhaps I should make time in the mornings for a some slave meditation to start my day off in the right direction. Perhaps I should stop right here before I give Master any ideas that could result in less sleep for this slave!!
His devoted slave
2 comments:
Please know you're not alone. We all feel like this at times. My husband just finished 8 day work week working 50 plus hours in 5 days and then another 3 days on top of that. Our time together has been topped off with a bad head cold for him. We too have people in the house, the emotional complications of one with mental health issues and the knowledge that someone so vastly important to my family will be leaving forever soon.
All this to say, I get it. I try when I'm alone to find myself, but it is difficult to do when he's here. I (selfishly) want him to bring me back. I know there is a balance in there, we just can't always find time, energy and sometimes in my case desire to.
I wish you well trying to maintain your portion of your dynamic.
willie
Thanks for the kind words, Willie! Don't get me wrong, we truly are thankful to have our girls and grandma here. Having this time together is a blessing. And to be honest, if we did have any alone time, we'd probably just curl up together and take a nap.�� Although, I sure could use a good long spanking right about now!
Hds
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