I'm Just Saying! (Celebrity Sex Scandals)

I'm going to venture away from my normal style of post this time.  I know, I know, but we all have to change things up every once in a while.  Today I'm going to take a look at a couple of people that we all (or most people) know.  They have been involved over the past year or two in some scandals that have had a big impact of their respective sport, and in some cases their family.  Yet, let's look at it from a totally new new and different angle.  Maybe there are reasons behind it that my readers will understand, but typical folks may not.  Let's look at why they did what they did, or at least a plausible reason behind their activity.

First up...you guessed it...Tiger Woods!

By now I think everyone in the world is familiar with Tiger and his escapades.  He has a Swedish Supermodel for a wife, and yet he had countless affairs with other women.  What would bring a guy, who makes $100 million  year and has a wife like that, to step out on her and seek a sexual relationship with another woman?  Some of the women may have been very attractive, and some, well, maybe not so much.  It didn't seem to me to be women that just happened to fall in his lap and he had a one time fling. 

Apparently he was missing something at home.  My opinion...I'm going to take a stab and say his wife is too vanilla for him.  I think he wanted to spank her and she said no.  I think he wanted to tie her up and she said no.  I think he wanted to humiliate her and she said no.  I think he wanted to control her orgasms and she said no.  So what's a guy to do?!?!  Apparently you go find a woman that will let you do all the things you enjoy and need to do. 

I'm just saying! 

Next on our list is.....Ben Roethlisberger!

For those that may not be familiar with him, he is the quarterback for the Pittsburgh Steelers football team of the NFL.  Ben is pretty well known in the sports world.  A couple of years ago he ran into a situation where he was accused of sexual assault.  Sexual Assault can be defined as any unwanted act of a sexual nature that is imposed on another person.  This doesn't necessarily include rape, or forcible sex with another person.  Charges were never filed criminally, but there is an ongoing civil suit in regards to that case.  Anyone can end up in a bad situation or get falsely accused of such an act.  Maybe you were just at the wrong place at the wrong time with the wrong person.  Here's the problem!  He has again been accused of sexual assault on a woman.  I'm different woman and different location.  I'm begining to see a patern of behavior here.  Charges are not being filed once again, for lack of evidence.  Yet, where smoke keeps appearing, thee's probably a fire nearby.

So why does Ben keep ending up in these situations?  My opinion...Ben likes rough sex.  Maybe Ben even likes BDSM play.  I think he was trying to spank the women, control the women, make demands on them, take what he thought was his, tie them up, and possibly even punish them for not listening to him.  Don't get me wrong...I DO NOT believe in unwanted touching or sexual advances on a woman.  That is not what this lifestyle is about.  Yet, is it plausible that Ben either got the wrong message from a woman, or just tried to use his celebrity power to take what he wanted, the way he wanted.  Ben could be into a lot of what we in this lifestyle are into.  He just happen to try to act it out wrongly, or picked a vanilla woman that didn't apreciate it.

I'm just saying!

Is it possible that high profile figures such as these two guys are into the lifestyle?  Is it possible that they have needs similar to the rest of us?  Is it possible they enjoy the power, control, and ownership over another person?  We'll probably never know, but....

I'm just saying!!!

Broken? I think Not!

Do you look in the mirror and see a clear picture of yourself?  Do you see yourself as broken?  Incomplete?  Hollow?  Confused?  Ugly?

Having dealt with a couple of newly self-discovered submissives, and talked with others, these are questions that can be very hard for them to answer.  There is no clear cut direction for them and they can feel lost and as though they are wandering about aimlessly.  The good part is that most submissives in this position find themselves under the direction of a Dominant, Master or Mentor.  They have someone to guide them long the journey they now find themselves traveling.  This is a great situation for a new submissive.  She will need a caring hand.  Someone to lead her down the path of enlightenment.  Someone that can keep her on the line and from straying.  Someone that can support her mentally and emotionally through this drastically changed time of her life. 

Some submissives however, find they are alone and not knowing how to deal with the feelings they have.  The reason they are alone is not that important.  The fact is that they are alone.  Many submissives know they have felt different their whole life. They have always felt submissive to others, not necessarily in a sexual sense, but have never really understood the feelings they have, or why.  This can be a very confusing time.  She is feeling the pull to be who and what she is, yet this can be contradictory to everything she has been told her whole life.  How to behave, what is expected of her, how a lady should act, to be a self-supportive independent woman, etc...  Nonetheless, she has the need to serve.  She has the need to be controlled.  She has the need to be used.  She has a need to be owned.  She has a need to feel some sexual freedom and be the slut she so needs to be.  She has strong sexual urges and fantasies that are far from the lady she has been taught to be by her upbringing and society. 

One of the hardest aspects to overcome on her new journey is acceptance.  Not just acceptance...but self-acceptance.  She must accept the fact that this is who she is.  She must accept that fact that it is alright to feel what she is feeling.  She must accept the fact that it is alright to think the thoughts that she does.  She must accept the fact that she needs to feel the control of another person.  That she needs to be used and know that she is pleasing to the person in control.  That she has strong sexual urges that need to be fulfilled.  This can be a very difficult step to take.  Yet...once she takes it and accepts who she is and needs to be, it can be the biggest weight off her shoulders she has ever felt.  She can feel more free than she has ever felt.  She is free to be herself and cease the internal battle of show she is versus who she thinks she is expected to be. 

Once she can look in the mirror and see herself for who she is, then she has taken a giant step forward.  Once she looks at herself and doesn't see herself as broken, and is not ashamed of what she sees, then she can not only be all she hopes to be for herself, but for another person.  This is an internal tug-of-war that can be hard to overcome.  However, once she does, she can feel good about spreading her wings and taking flight. 

Broken?  I think Not!

I Won't Lie, I Wish That I...

This post will be a bit off the normal topic for me, but, hey...we have to vary things a little bit, now don't we?!?!  LOL!

I grew up as a child of the 80's.  Ok, well...that was my teen and high school years anyway.  From time to time you will see me post about music and lyrics.  Music, whatever your taste, has a big influence on us all.  It can bring out raw emotions like nothing else.  You can hear a song you know and it will always remind you about a time in your life, good or bad.  In my day, it was all about big hair bands.  One band has stood the test of time, and is just as strong today as they were in the 80's.  They have quite an empire, and sell out stadiums no matter where they go...Bon Jovi.

The reason for all this is I heard one of their newer songs on my way into work today.  I really liked it and the chorus is what really got to me.

Who's going to save you
When the stars fall from your sky
And who's going to pull you in
When the tide gets too high
Who's going to hold you
When you turn out the lights
I won't lie I wish that I
Could be your superman tonight

The song is "Superman Tonight" and is on the album "The Circle".  In case you'd like to listen to it, here is the video:

We all have songs that have a special meaning to us.  They remind us of a special time, place, or person.   Without music this would be a boring place.  Enjoy the music that moves you and brings special meaning to your life, just like that special person you can't live without.

The Body Doesn't Lie

This post is directed more at new subs than established one, but I think many of us can relate.

I had a discussion with a woman last night abut her desires and experiences in the BDSM world. Well, she hadn't had much experience or exposure to it, but what she did have she loved. She has only been involved in one relationship, if you even want to call it that, where this type play was acted out. It really wasn't even a D/s relationship, as much as the guy she was seeing liked to dominate her sexually. The main problem for her was that she was pushed way too far, way to fast, and she had to end the relationship with this gentleman, for fear of her own safety. I did congratulate her for having the strength to stand up for herself and know what was best.

Having given you some of the background, it is not really the point of this. During our conversation, she mentioned several times about her being scared and/or nervous during their play. Not for fear of safety, but fear of the unknown. Not having been involved before, she had no life experience in this arena and no idea of what to expect or how to handle things, mentally, emotionally, or physically. One thing she said to me really stuck out...how wet she got during play.

This was new to her. She had never experienced play of this intensity. Yet, it did not matter whether there was pleasure or pain involved...the intensity and anticipation made her wetter than she had ever been. I told her, that in my experience, this is a mark of a true submissive.

"The body doesn't lie!" You may fight against him, you may not be sure of the activity, you may say that you aren't into the stinging pain...but when your pussy is drenched more than ever before, then subconsciously this turns you on and excites you, even if you don't know it will. Maybe it's the actual physical nature of the situation, maybe is the mental. It could be the excitement of the feeling of his control, his dominance, your own submission. Regardless, the body doesn't lie. It's a natural response that you can't help or control. Your mouth may be saying no, but your pussy is screaming yes at the top of its lungs. Now don't get me wrong with that statement. I do not at all condone or support non-consensual activities (ie: rape or sexual assault). My intention is to point out that it may be new, you may be nervous, or even a bit scared, but your body will tell the real story.

This lifestyle is not for everyone. Some women would never get turned on by the activities we all love so much. That is perfectly fine. But, for those that do, or more so those that are wondering, this could be your own self-test. No matter how you feel, does it turn you on? Do you feel it between your legs? Do you get wetter than ever? Then this could be just what you need.


The Body Doesn't Lie!

No Need For Words

I gathered up a few pictures lately that realy have a great sense of menaing to me.  I think they will for my readers and followers as well.  They are self-explanatory, and I have no need to discuss them like some of the ones we have done before.  Yet, don't let that stop you.  Feel free to leave your comments and thoughts.  I only mean that there is not a lot of room for multiple angles in which to view these.  I'm always happy to banter back and forth if you so wish.  :)

Enjoy!

Anticipation

As he approached her from behind, she heard such sweet words in her ear.  "Go upstairs, get undressed, and get into your position and wait.  I'll be there shortly!"  These are the words she needed to hear.  She loved being in her position of servitude, barenaked on her knees waiting for him.  But what would he do?  How would she get to serve him today?  What does he have in store for her?  It doesn't really matter...she belongs to him and he is free to do watever he likes.  She knows this...she loves it...she lives for it. 

As the previous little snippet eludes to, her waiting for him, and all the thoughts that run through her head while doing so, builds and builds the anticipation she has for this moment.  She gets that nervous wrench in her stamoch, yet it excites her.  She loves to serve and be his pet for whatever he likes.  But she can't help bu to wonder what is to come...what is to be of her this time.  As a Dom, I love this.  Anticipation is a great mind game that will always be in play, whether it is intended or not.  there is no way around it. 

Anticipation can come or be caused  from several different situations.  One is teasing, which is one of my favorites.  Telling my sub "I have plans for you", followed by a slight chuckle under my breath, will immediately send her mind into wonder and anticipation.  "I'm going to take you places and make you feel things you need, and maybe even places and feelings you have yet to experience".  She knows what all could be involved, but what will actually be involved only HE knows.  The building of the tension, the excitement of what could be, the nervousness.  Most subs love this feeling.  Even though it may make them a bit scared and apprehensive, it excites them to no end as well.  She will feel the throb between her legs, she will get wet with excitement, her nipples will harden, her pulse will race, the adrenaline with be pumping.  She knows he is about to claim his stake on her, and she needs and wants nothing else but that. 

Another form of anticipation is knowing what is coming ahead of time.  Maybe it is something she wants, and maybe it is not.  Yet, that anticipation of what will be will keep building within her, right up to the moment it comes to fruition.  It could be something she loves, and can't wait for it to happen, or it could be punishment and she can't wait to get it over with.  Either way, the anticipation of knowing it is coming will build excitement and tension within her. 

A Dom can be filled with anticipation as well.  Although, most of the time he knows what is coming and in store for their activities.  Still, he can be just as excited about what he will be doing with his sub, and feel the anticipation build of what is forthcoming.  The excitement of the aniticpation is just as fun and arousing for him.  In my opinion, if he doesn't get excited about what he is going to do, then he has lost his edge.  What's the point if you're not excited and wanting to perform? 

Anticipation runs rampant in a D/s relationship.  It is engrained in it so deeply that it will never be lost.  It is a natural part of the establishment.  The anticipation itself can be the high at times.  Feel the excitemnt, the nervouseness, the tension the adrenaline, and enjoy the way it affects you. 

Feel the "Anticipation".

It's Time For A Spanking

I have read a lot of posts lately, and even not so lately, about spanking, both from a Dominant's side and a submissive's side.  I got to thinkng about how much a part of this lifestyle spanking seems to be, either for pleasure or punishment.  Spanking also really seems to diffrentiate those in this lifestyle from those in the vanilla world.  For the purposes of this post, I am lumping all ass attention into one category of spanking (actual spanking, either by hand or implement, whipping, caning, belting, etc...)

From a Dominant's perspective, I think he feels he needs to exert his power and control.  Sometimes this is done through punishment, and sometimes because he can.  A Dom needs to be able to push the limits of his sub, while allowing her to feel the control he has over her.  A Dom needs to be able to exert his prowess and keep his sub in line.  Spanking is a physical activity in which he can inflict controlled pain, to an area that will not cause great bodily injury or long lasting wounds.  Yet, most of the time he doesn't do it strictly for the aspect of pain itself, although he does at times.  It's more of the mental aspect and ensuring his sub feels his control and knows her place.  He does it for her!  He does it because he needs to do it for her, and she needs it.  He needs to feel her submission and that she is completely his.

(I love the goosebumps all over her.)

From another perspective, I have read so many times lately in posts by submissives, how they NEED spankings.  When a sub gets out of line, she feels she needs to feel her Dom's power and control in punishment.  Sometimes she will purposely push his limits just to test where the line in the sand is, and to make sure he is in control and will stand behind what he says.  I have read several different posts lately about subs saying how much they really need a spanking NOW.  They feel out of kilter, and need to feel the cpower and control, by physical manifestation of their Dom, to feel balanced and in place...to feel get back to feeling like the sub that she is and needs to be.

Spanking is something that the vanilla world does not understand.  To them it is something fun to do every so often, if ever, just in fun or in the moment.  They do not understand the control, submissiveness, and the pain apects that are needed in this lifetsyle.  To a lot of the vanilla world it is abuse.  They do not like it, agree with it, or want any part of it.  For them...that is perfectly fine.  They are welcome to conduct their lives the way they see fit.  But...do not judge those of us in this lifestyle and the way we conduct ourselves and our activities.  We have needs and reasons for doing what we do.  One should not mock or put down what he does not understand. 

Spanking is an essential part of this lifestyle.  It is needed by both Doms and subs.  It is deeply engrained in our lifestyle and an integral part of the dynamic of a D/s relationship. 

Happy Spanking!!!