Blog Takeover!

I'm going to try something a bit new.  I'm going to let you all take over my blog.  Ok...not totally.  Did you really think I would give up control?!?!  Even of my blog?!?!  NO WAY!!!  However, I am looking for your input.  Yes, from all of you out there that follow, read, lurk, and hide in the shadows.  This is a chance for anyone and everyone to join in, and still hide in the shadows if you prefer. 

I am going to accept questions to answer.  I'm going to take suggestions.  I'm going to accept topics and subjects on which to write.  All suggested by you.  So if it is on your mind, in your thoughts, something you have wondered about, etc... then send it on in.  Whatever the subject or topic, feel free to let me know.  I can't promise I will answer or write on everything that may be submitted, but I will do what I can. 

There are several ways you can submit something to me:

1) Leave it in the comments section of this post.
2) Email it to me directly. (dauntlessvitality@yahoo.com)
3) Use my Formspring box in the right sidebar of my blog.  Just remember you are limited to 250 characters that you can write in Formspring.
4) You can use the ASK Box on my Tumblr page. (http://dvsarousal.tumblr.com/ask)

When submitting, please make sure I know your submission is part of this request.  Feel free to submit as Anonymous if you like.  I won't publish any identities if you request I keep them to myself.  If you don't indicate for me to do so, then I am likely to post who sent me the question or suggestion.

So bring it on!  Put them on me!  Let me hear what you have to say or want to know.  I'm hoping this will be a good way for us all to be open and communicate, both with what I say in response and with the follow-up comments from my readers.  I do love an open exchange from everyone.  No question is dumb or stupid...if you don't know but want to, all you have to do is ask.  We are all here to learn.  Seasoned veteran in the lifestyle, or new to the scene...it doesn't matter. 

I look forward to hearing from you all, and seeing what is on your mind and what you would like to know.


DV

Fantastic Ass Friday (FAF)

Here we are..ending the week with another highly anticipated edition of FAF.  Thanks to all that have continued to stop by and vote.  I really do appreciate your participation, and there would be no reason to keep doing this without all of you.  So...thanks!

Last week's winner is posted to the right.  We had an ethnic theme last week.  This wee we are going to have a theme of multiple asses per picture.  I hope you enjoy the ones I have chosen for you.

Have a great weekend everyone!

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The Strength Within

In my previous post I spoke about how those outside of TTWD seem to view this lifestyle.  Appearances aren't always as they appear.  Those of us involved in this lifestyle know there is much more to it than what someone may see at a glance.  This goes much deeper than the mere physical appearances of the activities we choose to bring into our relationships...much deeper.  There is a warning label on the passenger side mirror of most cars..."Objects in mirror are closer than they appear".  For all of us, maybe it should read..."Relationships are much deeper and more involved than they appear". 

I had a conversation with Sunshine this weekend that reminded me of just how deep and involved our relationships can be.  I also read some comments on a post this morning at The Empty Collar.  The topic that coincided with the conversation and the post is the strength of a submissive woman.  That is not to say in any form or fashion that any woman isn't and can't be strong.  But alas, here in my world I speak of the D/s lifestyle, so that is the platform from which I stand and speak. 

I think those people that peek in from the outside see a submissive as being weak.  They see a woman being owned and controlled by a man (reverse the gender roles if you like), and view this as a weakness.  Many people don't think a woman should bow and cede herself to a man...or to anyone for that matter.  They think she should stand on her own two feet and be able to take care of herself.  She should be assertive and able to take charge of any situation.  I say this is a bunch of bologna. 

I say that it takes a very strong woman to be willing and able to submit.  It doesn't matter whether she is currently involved with a Dominant or on her own.  The core person is still there and strong.  She has to be strong to be able to not only comprehend her need for submission, but then be able to act upon that need.  A woman must be strong mentally and emotionally to be able to give herself to someone the way a submissive woman does.  There is no weakness in needing to give yourself to a Dominant.  It is that deep inner strength that makes her a good submissive.  Someone without that strength will have a very hard time opening up and baring herself completely.  Not to mention, this strength is combined with raw determination to be able to stay the course and follow through with what she desires the most.  We all know...it isn't always easy. 

Back to my conversation with Sunshine...I didn't talk to her about strength as my submissive.  I spoke to her about the strength she has within her as a person.  Granted the two may go hand in hand, but that wasn't the point.  The point for her, which can also apply to Histoy, is this...  Always stand strong, be proud of who you are, and don't let anyone make you think less of yourself.  Anyone that tries to bring you down is only afraid and insecure about themselves.  They will belittle you and try to make you feel smaller about yourself in order to feel better about themselves.  So, stand tall, smile, and be happy with nothing less than the person you are at your best. This will enable you to become even stronger, more self-aware, and more secure with yourself.  Being able to look inside and being happy with what you see is what matters most of all. 

"You are stronger than you think, and I have shown you just how strong and important, and appreciated you are.  Let your inner strength flow and don't allow what anyone else says or does make you think any less of yourself.  Let them look like a fool on their own with the less than desirable behavior they may exhibit.  In the end, it will be they that will be seen as a lesser and weaker person.  I am proud of you as a person...all that you are and can be.  I am proud and honored to be able to call you mine." 

Fantastic Ass Friday (FAF)

Thanks to everyone that came by and voted last week.  There was a good turn out and number of votes, making it interesting.  I like a lot of votes and it being a close race.  The winner from last week is posted to the right. 

I'm going to try to have a special theme each week for the next few weeks.  I haven't done this in a while, so I thought we would shake things up a bit.  This week I'm going to do something that was requested once before.  I haven't done it in a while, so it is overdue to get back on FAF.  I hope you all enjoy it.

This week's theme is...Ethnic.  Have a great weekend everyone! 

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The View From The Outside

How are we perceived?  How do others see us?  How do others view this lifestyle?  These are questions we all face and think about at one time or another.  Those of us in this lifestyle know what it is all about, or are at least learning.  We see things that we know we need from it.  Those needs may vary, and the dynamic you need may be different from the next person, but we all fall under the umbrella in some form or fashion of some type of power exchange relationship. 

I have had some conversations with my Sunshine about this very thing...how this lifestyle is perceived by those outside of it.  The view from the outside is much different than the view on the inside.  We did not meet under the assumption of a D/s relationship, but I did make it clear very early on that this was a big part of who I am.  She had her own views of what all it entailed, which is like so many people not involved or having experience in TTWD.  Yet, her views and perception of this has changed dramatically.  She has found a side of herself that was hidden...and maybe she didn't even know existed.  She knows it now, and is embracing every ounce of it she can, and I couldn't be happier about that.

I was reminded of the perception of others when I read a post of another blogger this morning.   The post was written by ALuv at Sincerely Yours... , and the post was titled In Search Of.  It made me think of the saying...don't judge a book by it's cover.  First appearances may make you think or believe a certain way, but if you take the time to look inside and delve a little deeper, you may see much more than you initially thought was there.   You may be missing a lot if you take something at mere face value and look only at what is seen on the surface.  Underneath it all there is much more than may meet the eye.  ALuv points this out and says it very well. 

"If someone would have said to me 4 years ago that D/s relationship is something I was going to be longing for I probably would have said "you are nuts!" and one of the reason was because I really didn't know what it was about, what it meant, how the dynamics of the relationship works.
I honestly thought it was only about leather, whips and chains, inflicting pain in others and getting a kick while doing so, so yeah, I sorta knew the basics *giggles*. I heard and seen the collars, the toys and just about a great deal of the kinks but I was unaware of the most important part of such relationships; trust, respect, communication, and obedience. The closeness between two people without inhibitions, absolutely no fear to say how one is feeling, please and be pleased, be heard and understood, understand and not judge, be so open that even when dressed in their presence they can see you completely naked. So wonderful *shivers"

I think people on the outside see and believe exactly as ALuv pointed out.  This is strictly about leather, whips, and chains, making demands and inflicting pain.  What is seen on television and on the internet does nothing to dispel this myth.  Yet, when you look beyond the surface, there is a whole other world of feelings, emotions, needs, and desires.  It is about the closeness, the respect, the trust, the love and care, the connection between two people.  It can be a relationship that is stronger and more open than any traditional relationship.  

So many people are afraid of the unknown.  They will look down upon something based upon how they perceive it...even when they really know nothing about it.  We all have our opinions.  I prefer to have an educated opinion, rather than making judgements on things I know nothing about.  There are many aspects of play in this lifestyle that aren't for me.  Does that mean I will talk bad about them?  Not at all!  Everyone has what works and doesn't work for them and there respective personalities and situations.  It's too bad so many people see TTWD as being out on the fringes, kinky, and as an alternate lifestyle.  To me it is a normal lifestyle.  I know this isn't for everyone, but it is for me...and obviously a lot of you as well. 

Don't be deterred by those that are ignorant to what we do.  There will always be people who don't understand.  Just as there will always be people who understand wholeheartedly.  Allow yourself the freedom to be who you are and to seek out what you need.  When dealing with those that aren't in the know...just smile, feel good about yourself, and know you are feeling and experiencing things that they will never even come close to knowing personally.  Maybe someday they will open their eyes enough to know what you know and be able to find a little piece of heaven for themselves. 

We Are Parts Of A Whole

This was taken from a post on a Tumblr Blog I follow...Desire's Journey.  She posts some great things so you ought to check out her Tumblr Blog.  Anyway, I thought this was fantastic.  When I read it, I felt as though I could have written this myself.  This encompasses my views and approach to TTWD so well. 

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What Is A Master?

 

I am a dominant man. I am just that.
I am not dominant because of any superiority on my part.
Not because I feel I am more intelligent, or wiser.
I am not dominant because of the strength or mass of my body.
I am not, nor would I want to be dominant with all women.

Yet to you, I am Master.

I am your Master only after earning your trust and I embrace your submissiveness.
I have looked into your heart and mind and clearly see your desires and passions.

You have thrown away your fears and inhibitions.
You tell me of the needs of your heart and body.
You have given me total access to your soul, and I accept the responsibility and honor.
You are a woman.
You are not weak or inferior because of it.
You are a treasure to be cherished.

We are not equal.

I have the strength of body and mind and the instinctive need to protect, possess, defend and provide for you.
You are a woman and instinctively stronger of will and heart.
Your belief in me gives me courage and direction.
Your strength disperses my doubt.
Your needs and desires encourage and give purpose to my efforts.

We are not equal. We are parts of a whole.
We complement each other and make each other complete.
My desire to dominate you is instinctive.

It is not to degrade you nor is it degrading to you because you are secure in being totally feminine.
We each recognize and accept our worth, and our need for someone to trust and fulfill our needs.

You are sure, strong and proud in your womanhood.
You do not submit as acceptance of inferiority, but from strength and passion.
You expect a man to stand strong and be a man.
You desire and flourish in the strength and control of a man.
In return you present control of your body, unqualified trust and honesty, and the faithfulness of your heart.
You submit because I have earned your trust.

Because I have opened my heart and soul to you.
Because I have listened to your words with my ears and heart and have learned to anticipate your needs and emotions. And because I have proven worthy in your eyes, you have given me the only true treasure of life;

You have given me dominance over you.
What you give is not abnormal, but pure, natural and the rarest gift a woman
could give a man.
You have given me complete and unshakable assurance of your commitment to me.
Your submissiveness is a magnificent gift and sacred responsibility.

I accept this from you with humility and joy.
I understand the rarity and purity of this gift.
I recognize it is your body and soul,
your heart and mind.
I dominate you only because you have allowed it.
I dominate only because you have allowed me to and when I see your body kneel before me, in my mind and heart you are raised above all other women and all the treasures of the earth.

What you give freely cannot in reality be bought and if it could, it would never mean the same..

 (Michael P. - Feb, 1994 - Compuserve)

Fantastic Ass Friday (FAF)

Thank God it's Friday!  For those of us in The U.S it is a Holiday weekend.  That means an extra day off for most of us on Monday.  Woohoo!  What's not to like about a long weekend.  And since the Holiday is Labor Day, that sort of marks the end of the summer.  Cooler weather will be moving in soon, and pushing out the repressive heat we have had in the south. 

Thanks for all that voted the last two weeks.  We had a great turnout, and it was a very tough and close vote to get the eventual winner.  The one that came out on top is posted to the right.  I hope we have just as good of a vote this week.  I think I have chosen some nice pictures for you this week. 

I hope you all have a great weekend, and a great Holiday for those of you in the States.  Stay safe, take care, and may the best ass win. 

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